shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
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