They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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