these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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