i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
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