okay pat passed out under dana's car
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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