and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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