how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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