I just saw a hot homeless man
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
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