its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
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youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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