listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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