That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize