he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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