Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
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