so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
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I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
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We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
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