I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
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