Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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