you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
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