I understand Curling. That high.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Boobs are out for the taking
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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