YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize