Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
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Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
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I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
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