The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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