U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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