Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
The air was thick with penises
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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