careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
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