This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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