3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize