I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize