Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize