I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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