Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
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I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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