Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Randomize