Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize