omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
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Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
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Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
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