I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize