i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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