...so i touched it.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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