all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
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