He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize