We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize