Just mADE A PArabola og urine
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
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