im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
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Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
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I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
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