It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
So much Jack, so little girl.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize