hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Church boner. Awkwardddd
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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