the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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