Joe is yelling at the trees again.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize