Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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