i jhust puked up my retainher.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I have fence marks all over my body
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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