Can Purell be used as lube?
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I am mentally ready for anal.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
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