Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
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