I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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